Cushions

Why do I have cushions? Why does anyone have cushions? They are fat little shits that take up too much of the bed, don’t fit their covers and somehow make the room into a mess when they hit the floor. I mean they aren’t for hugging, that’s why I have teddies, so why cushions?

This has been one of those nights where just when I think I’m settled for the night I realise the computer plug is out. Too lazy to get up off my bed, I painfully lean over my screen, sinking my stomach into its painful edge, and I successful grab the wire.

The wire is alas tangled with my lamp, which has marked out a corner of the floor for its territory for many moons now, and the lamp topples over defiantly. Thus I have to get up off the bed anyway to correct this tangle. Really could have saved myself some pain.

I don’t know why I start these things; I usually get bored of them. I guess it’s because I don’t like getting too personal in case someone I know comes across this and trouble ensues.

This is all being typed on Word right now because my internet has been dead for three days now. I really would like to scream down to the company but I know how they are when it comes to problems like these- useless.

No point dwelling on it, obviously if you’re reading this the problem was solved and I got the internet back. So back to the cushions, bought purely because my new bed set came with cushion covers and I did not want them to go to waste. MISTAKE. Ladies in particular, when you’re thinking of buying a cushion just don’t. The weird pros we women come up with to justify such kooky purchases are not worth the cons in this case. If you already have a cat or a dog you really don’t need them because all they do is take up space only they don’t give you the kisses and love of a dog or threatening Satanic glares of a moggy. *I hate cats, you love cats, I don’t care, deal with my hatred.*

Cushions are like that fat twenty-something son who won’t move out, they just lie there, growing and growing and growing and never giving you anything back. Oh sure, they look pretty at first, give something to the room but then the squish out of shape, somehow escape these covers that were a perfect fit and for reasons unknown, they move about and add only chaos to the room.